


Enmeshed

by Momtrash70



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Canon Compliant, Episode: s14e13 Lebanon, First Kiss, M/M, Post-Episode: s14e12 Prophet and Loss
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-08
Updated: 2019-02-09
Packaged: 2019-10-24 05:10:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17698253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Momtrash70/pseuds/Momtrash70
Summary: Post se14ep12What happens when they get back to the Bunker...





	1. Enmeshed

**Author's Note:**

> First attempt, Like, EVER.  
> Not sure if I should continue it (and I am definitely not ready to write smut! lol)...but this scene was in my head after watching last week's episode and would not be ignored! (Much like Cas...lol)

Post S14e12 Prophet & Loss  
~ ~ ~  
Cas had been silent the entire drive back.  
Dean had noticed, but with the echoes of Michael still banging around inn his head, and the throbbing of his jaw where Sam had punched him, he was content to just turn up the music and tune out.  
As they pulled into the Bunker garage, Sam gave Dean a look that said “Don’t try and go anywhere, please?” His face for a moment showing the shadow of the little brother he remembered…scared when Dean would leave him alone.  
Dean nodded silently, hand on the door handle.  
As he stood up, he was presently grabbed by his shirt and pushed up against the Impala.  
Cas had fire in his eyes, his face close to Deans as he breathed hard and tried to compose himself enough for words.  
“Hey Cas – what the-?”  
He stopped as he saw Cas’ face, a mixture of rage, pain…and something else…  
“I will NOT abide by you taking your life so trivially.” He growled. “I did NOT spend my grace putting your vessel back together atom by atom to have you throw it away …or worse, give it to Michael wholesale without a fight!”  
“Cas, I…”  
“NO!” His voice rang through Dean’s very cells, and for a moment he was actually scared of his friend.  
“I have watched you go through so much in these years we have spent together,” he continued…voice leveling to a more intimate tone so that only Dean could hear.  
“I have kept many of my thoughts to myself, when I thought you were being rash or just a hard-headed version of a Winchester,” Cas spat out the last word like a combination of a curse and prayer. He tightened his grip…Dean stayed silent, stunned by Cas’ show of strength…he hadn’t seen BAMF Cas in a long time.  
“We’ve ALL made our deals, Dean,” he grumbled. “But you are bound to ME…” His voice trailed off.  
Cas gulped, eyes glued to Deans in silent pleading, the moment lasted too long, neither of them moved, breathed. “I can’t…” he whispered, barely audible, “I can’t lose you… Without you…” His voice was still angry, but now a tremble entered beneath.  
Dean was frozen, unsure of whether he should even try to argue, or if Cas had more to say. His mind racing, even as they were both so close, breathing in sync.  
Before he could register it, Cas was on him… Mouth accosting his… and before either realized, arms entwined as tongues did.  
All the years of longing melted away, both of them whimpering in the release of it. Hands in hair, touching faces, tears coming even in light of so much JOY at the revelation between them. Mouths never letting go, breathing as one.


	2. One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ...So then the next day happens...and "That's a story"...So Dean tells it.

Post Lebanon…

The other evening had been, well, confusing for both.  
They stopped abruptly, each questioning motives, self-doubt, and crazy fantasies….  
Dean pulled away first, trying to grasp a breath, but also trying to find a thread of sanity in his recent life events……  
Cas immediately shrank back upon himself, thinking he read signs wrong…even if he had been the instigator, he doubted his actions, his motives…  
So Cas left  
And Dean had dinner with his parents and brother, one big happy family, right?  
And as much as he was proud of who they were. Who he and Sam and everyone became…. He couldn’t shake the pain of thinking there was a Cas out there who didn’t KNOW him.  
The bruises and lacerations would heal, but after that kiss… to think there could be a lifetime where there was no cas…? No memories, no moments…between them? It shook Dean to his core…

 

And here is Cas, standing at the bottom of the stairs. Mom and Sam said goodnight, it was Dean’s story to tell…  
~ ~ ~  
Dean maybe wasted time gathering things for a good story telling…popcorn, beer, and he made sure cas had his favorite blanket…(he’d noticed, on movie nights, Cas’ preference for a certain blanket and corner of the couch) He shuffled around, nervous energy, telling Cas of the “temporal paradox” etc… but not venturing near the emotions touched by John’s love and pride…and loss.  
So Cas finally stops him from his rambling.  
“I’m sorry I couldn’t be here for you during this difficult time.” Cas says  
Dean looks at him as if he’d sprouted antennae…  
“Really…?” Dean says…his eyes growing dark, pissed at the condescension.

Dean keeps going…  
“ I loved seeing my dad, my mom, together…even if they would both have to feel that heartbreak again of losing each other” he took a deep breath and kept going….  
“I was glad Sammy got that final hug and good bye he needed…”  
“but the thing I couldn’t STAND was meeting a Castiel who didn’t know ME” Dean took a shuddering breath…and kept going. (Cas is frozen on the spot)  
“I KNOW you Cas….how you are grumpy the morning after a hunt (or any morning for that matter), how you tried to be a father to Claire by buying her a stupid stuffed cat, How you really like your toast just so with your coffee the right blend…”  
He trailed off as Cas’ expressions softens  
“I couldn’t handle a Cas who thought I was nothing more than a bug to be squished. I couldn’t handle you not being YOU… fallen, burned wings, and all… You are MY Angel…”

And again, Cas could not find the words to express his gratitude …that events would bring them back into each other’s arms.  
“and you are my Dean…” he said softly


End file.
